They say you come of age when you stop being a teenager. That isn't the case in Nepalese society. In our society we come of age after a ritual. I will explain about the ritual by relating my own experience with it.
The ritual usually involves a slew of middle aged couples, that including your relatives, and/or any family friends your parents have had. Your parents aren't involved in any manner whatsoever. In fact, when the year of your coming-of-age is announced, your parents become excited and begin planning a trip for themselves. As the day came nearer, my parents were growing more and more restless. I had never seen my parents this excited in my life yet. All the preparations were made.
Finally the day would come in two days. I went to see my girlfriend before the ritual. Her date was planned for next year, and she told me her parents were getting pretty hyped about it too. It was a common thing I guess. She studied in a different college than mine so we never ran out of things to talk about. We had lunch at my favorite burger place, walked around the Mall and went off to see the sunset. As I looked at the orange sky and the night crept slowly upon us, I wondered what the ritual was about. I shared how I felt about it with her, and she looked at me for some time before asking if I expected to be a changed person after it. I told her I hadn't really thought about that, and we both remained silent for a long time. It was almost time so we drove back and I dropped her off and returned to my place. My parents had left for their trip this morning after making sure everything was right. And as I entered my house still eager about the ritual, I realized it had already begun.
The house was dimly lit as I saw from the garage. The lights were strangely low, as if intentional. I took off my shoes and made my way inside. I could hear murmurs coming from the living room, so I went there instead of my own room. As I entered the room the room went dead silence. At least forty pairs of eyes were on me. I realized the rooms were dimly lit because of candle lights glowing in the dark. I couldn't make out any specific faces unless someone really came close to me. I wasn't sure what to do so I just stood at the doorway awkwardly. I hadn't seen so many people in my living room at once, and the ambiance wasn't very friendly. Suddenly two of the figures sitting near the doorway got up and came to me. Then I saw they were the next door neighbors who I greeted everyday with 'uncle' and 'aunty'. As they came really close aunty grabbed my left hand and uncle whispered into my right ear something like 'coming-of-age... arrival ... big day..' that I didn't fully grasp, but I was beginning to realize something profound was going to happen. Sweat beads appeared on my forehead. Everyone was dead silent and looking at me since the moment I entered, never flinching. Aunty wiped the sweat off my forehead with her hand and then she smiled at me, without saying a word. Then she handed me a piece of cloth neatly folded. Uncle whispered me to tie it around my eyes so I couldn't see. I felt like I had to do this for some reason. I closed my eyes and tied the cloth in front of it so I couldn't see anymore, just hear the sound of forty people breathing as if humming a melancholy tune. And then, aunty unbuttoned my shirt off, while uncle unzipped my pants. I was too much in shock to protest or move, so I just froze there. The humming was growing louder with every cloth that was stripped away from my body. Finally there I was, standing stark naked in my living room doorway with a piece of cloth over my eyes. I could hear people rising from their seats and coming towards me. Several hands ran through my exposed skin all over my body. With each new hand I felt a sort of chill running down my spine. As the hands touched every portion of me I realized that they were humming a tune after all. At this point I was so much away from my mind that I too begun humming with everyone. The hands moved through my body in rhythm with the tune I was humming. And as I synced my voice to the echo of their voices I felt I was a part of this now, and there was no looking back.
Up until now, I had no idea how long the ritual lasted that night, because when I woke up in my own bed the next morning it all felt like sort of a dream, except for the hand marks all over my body. It was all real. The ritual was complete and the house was empty. My parents would return from the trip pretty soon. I had promised to meet my girlfriend that day for lunch. She is going to want to hear about the ritual. It was, after all, her coming-of-age next year. Maybe, its best to let her experience it first-hand.
The ritual usually involves a slew of middle aged couples, that including your relatives, and/or any family friends your parents have had. Your parents aren't involved in any manner whatsoever. In fact, when the year of your coming-of-age is announced, your parents become excited and begin planning a trip for themselves. As the day came nearer, my parents were growing more and more restless. I had never seen my parents this excited in my life yet. All the preparations were made.
Finally the day would come in two days. I went to see my girlfriend before the ritual. Her date was planned for next year, and she told me her parents were getting pretty hyped about it too. It was a common thing I guess. She studied in a different college than mine so we never ran out of things to talk about. We had lunch at my favorite burger place, walked around the Mall and went off to see the sunset. As I looked at the orange sky and the night crept slowly upon us, I wondered what the ritual was about. I shared how I felt about it with her, and she looked at me for some time before asking if I expected to be a changed person after it. I told her I hadn't really thought about that, and we both remained silent for a long time. It was almost time so we drove back and I dropped her off and returned to my place. My parents had left for their trip this morning after making sure everything was right. And as I entered my house still eager about the ritual, I realized it had already begun.
The house was dimly lit as I saw from the garage. The lights were strangely low, as if intentional. I took off my shoes and made my way inside. I could hear murmurs coming from the living room, so I went there instead of my own room. As I entered the room the room went dead silence. At least forty pairs of eyes were on me. I realized the rooms were dimly lit because of candle lights glowing in the dark. I couldn't make out any specific faces unless someone really came close to me. I wasn't sure what to do so I just stood at the doorway awkwardly. I hadn't seen so many people in my living room at once, and the ambiance wasn't very friendly. Suddenly two of the figures sitting near the doorway got up and came to me. Then I saw they were the next door neighbors who I greeted everyday with 'uncle' and 'aunty'. As they came really close aunty grabbed my left hand and uncle whispered into my right ear something like 'coming-of-age... arrival ... big day..' that I didn't fully grasp, but I was beginning to realize something profound was going to happen. Sweat beads appeared on my forehead. Everyone was dead silent and looking at me since the moment I entered, never flinching. Aunty wiped the sweat off my forehead with her hand and then she smiled at me, without saying a word. Then she handed me a piece of cloth neatly folded. Uncle whispered me to tie it around my eyes so I couldn't see. I felt like I had to do this for some reason. I closed my eyes and tied the cloth in front of it so I couldn't see anymore, just hear the sound of forty people breathing as if humming a melancholy tune. And then, aunty unbuttoned my shirt off, while uncle unzipped my pants. I was too much in shock to protest or move, so I just froze there. The humming was growing louder with every cloth that was stripped away from my body. Finally there I was, standing stark naked in my living room doorway with a piece of cloth over my eyes. I could hear people rising from their seats and coming towards me. Several hands ran through my exposed skin all over my body. With each new hand I felt a sort of chill running down my spine. As the hands touched every portion of me I realized that they were humming a tune after all. At this point I was so much away from my mind that I too begun humming with everyone. The hands moved through my body in rhythm with the tune I was humming. And as I synced my voice to the echo of their voices I felt I was a part of this now, and there was no looking back.
Up until now, I had no idea how long the ritual lasted that night, because when I woke up in my own bed the next morning it all felt like sort of a dream, except for the hand marks all over my body. It was all real. The ritual was complete and the house was empty. My parents would return from the trip pretty soon. I had promised to meet my girlfriend that day for lunch. She is going to want to hear about the ritual. It was, after all, her coming-of-age next year. Maybe, its best to let her experience it first-hand.
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